This article from the UK Daily Mail scares me.
First, an anecdote:
One of my male friends is looking to move home, out of the city centre and into the suburbs. I asked where he fancied – north, south, east or west. He shrugged. ‘I have no say in it,’ he said. ‘It’s not my decision.’
I pointed out that choosing where to live is one of the biggest decisions we make. Plus, he’d be paying for at least half of it. Surely he had some say? He shook his head. ‘The wife decides.’
This same friend last year kowtowed to his then girlfriend’s desire for a massive wedding with more than 200 guests and costing more than £20,000, even though he admitted that his preference would have been for a much smaller and more intimate affair.
And another anecdote:
One of my friends, a stay-at-home mother to two young children, says she is absolutely ‘the decider’ in her marriage.
‘My husband earns the money and I decide how we spend it,’ she says. ‘I feed and dress us all. I decide where and when we go on holiday. I choose everything for the house and have just decided to get an extension.
‘I even buy my own birthday present from my husband and our children. Actually, I quite often feel as if I have three children, not two. But that’s the way it is.’
She went on: ‘If I had to consult and strive for equality in every decision, we’d never get anything done. It sounds very old-fashioned, but basically my husband is the provider – in financial terms – and I am in charge of running the show.
‘Some people would no doubt say my husband’s “under the thumb” or that I “wear the trousers”. Although I hate the thought, it’s probably true.’
Then the research:
Studies appear to confirm that women are increasingly the dominant decision-making force in relationships.
A recent report found that by 2020 women will be driving the world economy and will have the final say in the majority of financial decisions in Britain’s homes.
Another study found that women make 80 per cent of all purchasing decisions, and 94 per cent of home furnishing purchases.
The study also found that in nearly half of all relationships men have no share in decision-making in the following four areas: household finances, big home purchases, the location of their homes, shared weekend activities and television viewing.
Does that sound like a good deal for men?
- Why men should refuse a woman’s offer of casual sex
- Dennis Prager investigates why men are in decline and how to fix it
- Are elderly women who have babies through IVF being selfish?
- What has Michele Bachmann got that third-wave feminists haven’t got?
- How feminism’s war against men ends up hurting women
- France introduces bill to require boards of directors to be 40% female
- France passes law to jail spouses who commit psychological violence
- Less than half of 7 to 21 year old women think marriage precedes child-bearing
- How feminism is opposed to chivalry, marriage and fathers
- What causes women to become single mothers, and how are children affected?
- Why did 77% of young unmarried women vote for Obama in 2009?
- New study shows that children of working mothers live unhealthier lives
- New Scientist article shows why fathers are necessary for children’s well-being
- 12-year-old girl sues Dad for grounding her… and wins!
WINTERY KNIGHT 
This is definitely a problem, but a lot of it is the guys’ own fault for being wussy.
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You should have seen what I had in the original post before I cleaned it up! I blame things like unilateral divorce and biased domestic violence laws which can be used to threaten and coerce men unfairly. I think that if a woman earn as much as (or more) than a man is also a risk factor to the man’s ability to lead. In this recession, 70% of the jobs lost are by men. 60% of undergraduate degrees go to women. It’s not just that men are wusses, it’s systemic discrimination and unfair laws.
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It is also feminism run amok. The feminist movement in this country has done more harm to gender roles, and therefore to the family unit, than just about any other issue I can think of.
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Chaps — I have lived in the UK for many years. This article, like the Daily Mail itself, caters to middle to upper middle class women. It was created that way in 1896 and it still lives up to its original concept (if they’d had mission statements then, that would have been in it).
I wouldn’t get too excited about this article, but, if you visit the UK, just don’t be surprised to see the dominant female spouse/partner in operation before your very eyes. This phenom goes back at least three generations, maybe more. I still haven’t found out why. No one seems to know.
Yet, there is still occasional male-on-female spousal and partner abuse in the working and upper-upper classes, so not everyone lives like this DM journo does. She should count her blessings. Think of it as just ‘earning a crust’.
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The author actually talks about her contempt for this sort of weak man.
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Could it have something to do with the two world wars? Women ran Britain during those years, and the male population was decimated, especially in WW1. Of course they weren’t the only country fighting in those wars, but there may be something in it….
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More likely the Anglican Church, imho
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Most likely the Anglican Church what?……held a car boot sale? An Alpha course?
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A leader is someone who is most accountable and who has more ownership than the rest.
The way I see it, many husbands today are not accountable or not made accountable enough for things like affairs and abandoning their families. Instead the government will pick up the mess.
A leader will demand that he/she is the person who make the decision.
At the moment, wives do those. It is generally accepted that women are more demanding but responsible in relationship. On the contrary, many men just want to work, then go home to watch sport and drink beer with their mates.
A leader is the person who is the most committed. Guess who are more committed in relationships today?
I could go on, but my point is that, you wouldn’t be a leader unless you act like one.
Of course another part to this is to demand the media to stop their portrayal of dumb, selfish husbands.
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Could not disagree with you more about what is causing this.
I think that feminism is to blame, with men having their role diminished by working mothers on the one hand, and the interference of the courts to regulate the home with feminist theory on the other. Please check out the link, especially the story on the court that overturned the man who grounded his daughter. Female daughter, Female ex-wife, Female lawyer, female judge. Is that the fault of the man not acting like a leader, or is it external to the man? Who would get married in Quebec? Only a fool.
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True. But men must stand up for their families, take ownership, assert their roles, and act like leaders.
Don’t let the court bully us, we have higher law to obey. We should not be afraid of prosecution when we follow our faith.
But then when the Western society decided to walk away from The Bible, this kind of things are not very surprising.
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Racing Boo — It probably is war-related. There may be a reluctance to discuss it because it would dredge up too many memories. I’m not sure. Nobody is. I do remember an elderly couple — former neighbours — who were in their 80s over a decade ago. The man predeceased his wife, but my better half and I will never forget that the only words he ever said when they were together were ‘Yes, dear’. I sincerely hope he is resting in peace. He was an architect and designed their marital home (quite an avant garde design with lots of land attached). But, to hear her talk, he was a nobody.
Drew — I hear what you’re saying, but, remember, we’re talking UK journalism here. Not everything is as it seems on the Features (‘Femail’!) page. She’d be the first to cry in the press if her man left her. I’ve seen it happen before — no sympathy. There was a journalist who dumped every man who made her pregnant. She has 3 kids. Let me just say that her fortunes have fallen considerably. She’s not even working in London anymore (probably working for a provincial newspaper). She was young, spiteful and openly critical of these men, on television, too. For no reason. They wanted to stay with her and the children. Things even out.
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