Childless single adults “co-parenting” children in loveless partnerships

Dina sent me this depressing article from the UK Daily Mail.


An increasing number of childless men and women, who are finding themselves single at 40, are now pairing up to build families, minus any romance.

Instead of becoming single parents by choice, these middle-age professional are turning to co-parenting, a growing trend where singles meet online with the sole objective to become
equal partners in raising a child.

Here’s one case:

Dawn Pieke, 43, is one woman who turned to co-parenting after her live-in boyfriend, who she was was ready to have children with, cheated on her.

‘I’ve met so many women in this same situation, who aren’t married and feel like they missed the boat,’ she said.

Ms Pieke said she found a Facebook group devoted to co-parenting, and soon found Australian resident Fabian Blue, 41, who wanted to be an equal partner in raising a child as much as she did.

She wanted a baby, but feared doing it alone because it was important for her to have a child who knew their father. She said, ‘I didn’t grow up with my dad.’

So rather than focusing on a love match, she decided to find someone to share both the financial and emotional stresses of child rearing.

Mr Blue had considered adoption, but ‘figured no one would let a single gay male adopt a child, and I didn’t have the kind of income for a surrogate,’ he said.

Here’s another one:

Rachel Hope, a 41-year-old real estate developer and freelance writer in Los Angeles, is usingModamily to seek a man who lives near her, is healthy, and ‘has his financial stuff together,’ she toldthe New York Times.

She met the athletic Parker Williams, a gay 42-year-old founder of QTheory, a charity auction company also in Los Angeles, and since October, the pair have been in serious discussions about having, and raising, a child together.

Ms Hope, who has a 22-year-old son and a 3-year-old daughter, both from co-parenting partnerships, and believes she may have found a third co-parent in Mr Parker, revealed that her first co-parent was a close friend – they decided to become non-romantic partners because of their belief that the institution of marriage was broken.

While they both had romantic relationships with others, they were first and foremost committed to their son, she said.

‘I get all the benefits of being married but I didn’t have all the weather patterns of sexual-romantic destabilization,’ she explained to Buzzfeed. ‘He was late twice in 20 years. And my son is extraordinary.

I’m not surprised by this. This is the next step up from single motherhood by choice, IVF and gay marriage. Children have become commodities, like an iPhone or a hand bag. They have no rights, and their needs are being neglected by selfish, narcissistic adults. These adults can’t be bothered to make wise decisions that will lead to a stable environment in which to raise a child. They don’t care that the child will never see the love between his or her mother and father. They only care about themselves.

2 thoughts on “Childless single adults “co-parenting” children in loveless partnerships”

  1. Hmmm…so they recognize what is important in looking for someone to raise children with. They’re looking for someone healthy, who will be there, that they can work together with, and who has their finances in order. Gee, why not just find that kind of person and actually learn to love them and have a real marriage? I guess such a thing has never occurred to them. They seem to think they have no control over who they love – that love just happens and it’s totally not their fault if they just can’t seem to fall in love with a person who would be a good parent.

    The thing is, when you chose romantic partners based on the wrong criteria, you are planning to “fall in love” with the wrong kind of person. Falling in love really isn’t some mystical thing. There is no Cupid shooting arrows at random strangers and making them fall in love. You fall in love with someone you spend time with and that you’ve learned to respect and admire.

    If you use superficial and meaningless criteria for romantic partners, you’re going to have bad experiences in relationships. And then no wonder the jerk you’re with, that you fell for because of his looks and fast car, isn’t husband and father material. Or no wonder the sexy vixen you met at a bar wouldn’t make a good mother. If you want kids, people, plan to spend time with those who would make a good spouse and parent. Learn to be attracted to that kind of person. Then marry one and stick with them. It’s really not so complicated.


  2. Romance (and the law) is the cause of the destruction of the American family. Why no mention of the (anti)family courts and no fault divorce?

    This will probably not pass moderation. Oh well, at least the Hindus in India (with a mere 1% divorce rate) have a better idea about family values.


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