In 2018, I wrote about a 54-year-old feminist who spent her entire life savings on a dating agency to find a rich husband. Kate spent her entire life writing columns to tell young women to live feminist lifestyles: get easy degrees, work easy jobs, spend money on fun and travel, get cosmetic surgeries, disrespect male leadership, and have lots of casual sex. How is she doing at age 63? Let’s find out.
Let’s first review my post from 2018, in part, and see what this woman was all about.
A couple of years ago, I too joined an expensive matchmaking agency. I had just come out of a seven year relationship, and was on the wrong side of 50.
I soon tired of online dating and receiving messages from over weight baldies who peppered their emails with childish emojis. I hankered to find Mr Right-for-me, a man who was suitably educated and a successful professional.
And so this is how I found myself, throwing money (my entire savings to be precise) to an upmarket matchmaking agency in central London. The agency claimed to filter out the undesirables, the mediocre and give clients the personal touch, so I handed over the hefty sum of £6,000.
So, just a few things about this lady Kate Mulvey. She has made some decisions that I find very unwise.
I documented my findings in my previous post:
- she has no useful degrees – she paid for useless degrees in Italian and French, instead of studying something useful, like computer science or nursing or petroleum engineering. Her “writing” is all about fashion, dating and “lifestyles”
- her opinion on children: “uppity children take your time, emotions and energy” – she sees children as a detriment to her highest priority (her career). She says “I, however, have lived a life of unfettered freedom to take on projects, write books and travel”
- she had loads of entertaining men “beating a path to [her] door” when she was younger
- she spend thousands of pounds on plastic surgery
- she blames her lack of marriage success on her being “brainier” than men
- she turned down men who wanted to marry her, as late as age 33
- her book is called “Accidental Singleton” because her approach to life – anti-marriage hedonism – has accidentally left her single and penniless at age 54
So, this woman, who scorns the leadership of men, made very bad decisions. Her columns are filled with constant bragging about how much smarter she is than men – men who have made far better decisions and achieved much greater prosperity than she has.
Here is the latest article, in which she explains what feminism told her to do with her life, and what that got her.
She writes:
I’m convinced that the reason I’m still booking a table for one at the age of 63 instead of having settled with a significant other is because, like so many women of my generation, feminism has ruined my love life. Instead of empowering us, those ideals of the second-wave feminists made us believe marriage and domesticity were to be avoided like the plague and that men were competition rather than partners.
[…]I had always imagined I would end up married with two wonderful children and living in a house in the countryside. I have paid a hefty price for my so-called liberation.
Act like men – demonize housework and family:
I was 17, and a pupil at Godolphin and Latymer – one of Britain’s most academic institutions – when I was introduced to the Women’s Liberation movement. It offered such hope and excitement, and we spent our lunch breaks soaking up the feminist mantras of Germaine Greer and Betty Friedan: “Act like men,” they cried as they burnt their bras and demonised housework and the family.
Recreational sex with hot pro-abortion bad boys who don’t judge:
Another thing I regret deeply is my tally of one-night stands when I was younger.
[..]My generation of women were encouraged to “have sex like a man” – in other words have casual sex…
The number of partners that a person (man or woman) has had before marriage is related to their likelihood of initiating divorce. So, someone like Kate Mulvey would be a high risk of divorce. Also, smart men don’t sign up for marriage to women who tell them that “my money is my money, and your money is our money“.
So, she spent her life telling young women to follow feminism, like she did. But are Christian leaders telling young women anything different? Many socially conservative Christian leaders believe in “servant leadership”, which means that men serve, and women lead. Instead of confronting lies and evil, men have to take out the trash, and dispense cash on demand for his wife’s handbags and travel.
Many social conservative Christians define masculinity as “men using their strength to benefit women”. In contrast, my wise advisor Dina taught me that masculinity is demonstrated when a man opposes lies and evil, and doesn’t let a woman distract him from those goals with her sex appeal. Dina would say that Christian men should only protect and provide for Christian women who are helpful to men, and led men take the lead to product results for the Boss. So, men should judge women. They should measure them, and choose good ones. And the job of Christian leaders is to produce women that good men want.
As I’ve blogged about before, there are many reasons why good men will be cautious about marrying feminists. Men are realizing that women today are not the same as their mothers and grandmothers. They don’t offer the same value to a marriage-minded man. They don’t respect men as much, and they don’t want to help a man who leads as much. Not only is there the problem of young women being extremely leftist, but there is also the problems of feminized laws, policies and courts being hostile to men. We need Christian leaders who fight against young women’s feminism while they are still young enough to have 4+ children. And we need leaders who fight against laws, policies and courts that are hostile to men.
WINTERY KNIGHT 
Amazing, you don’t own a house, own no car, no prospects of a job and yet you hand over 6,000 to find someone that may be interested in you. And you expect men to beat down your door to have a relationship with you? Absolutely amazing.
LikeLike
She’s just “brainier” than the men she wants to pay for her retirement, that’s why the men don’t want her. Pretty sure.
LikeLiked by 1 person
But if ANYONE told her she’d arrive at 63 and be filled with regret about her life choices, she called them a woman hating bigot.
In fact, I know “Christian” women who’ve been married 20+ years but who still harbor the imprint of radical feminism even though their husbands rescued them from this inevitable end.
They’re mad that they don’t have what feminism falsely promised them AND they blame their husbands (and “society”) for it. Even though their husbands rescued them from the inevitable despair that this fool of a woman is now engulfed in.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I think we should have a two-pronged approach to this. First, we should be doing what I just did, which is to show the actual results of following the feminist life plan. I think talking about childlessness, fatherlessness, and growing old alone should be regularly discussed by Christians and conservatives. Second, more than just telling stories about specific women, we should be bringing up surveys and statistics that show the results of feminism. The decline of women’s happiness, for example.
LikeLiked by 1 person
The only thing Kate Mulvey should have written was:
“Don’t make the mistakes I made. Don’t be like me.”
LikeLiked by 2 people
A lot of Christian women are doing good work by warning young women about how feminism lied to them and put them on a wrong path. I wish we had more of that.
LikeLike
“Dina would say that Christian men should only protect and provide for Christian women who are helpful to men, and let men take the lead to product results for the Boss.”
As a Christian male and as a father, I think this guidance is not only incomplete, it is positively misleading. A Christian husband should protect and provide for their lawfully wedded wife, irrespective of whether she is “helpful to men”. That is part of the job I signed up for when I married her. My obligation to protect and provide was and is no way contingent on her letting me take the lead. This is entirely consistent with Paul’s command “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church …” (Ephesians 5:25) (Yes, I’m deliberately leaving out how much Christ sacrificed for the good of his People/church as that is another discussion entirely. It also supports the proposition that a man should be careful when choosing the woman who will become his wife as those vows have real consequences.)
Christ also was far more inclusive as to who should be protected and helped beyond the immediate family as revealed in the Parable of the Good Samaritan. All Christians are called to love their neighbor as they love themselves – and the definition of neighbor is far broader than you might initially think. To be clear, that doesn’t require that you love your neighbor more than yourself, it doesn’t require setting up governmental programs to help the poor/downtrodden, and it doesn’t preclude tough love when that is appropriate.
In this context, masculinity properly becomes about protecting those who need protection and providing for one’s family (and after providing for one’s immediate family, for a greater family if you can). It should not mean that masculinity requires men to use their strength to benefit women. That strength is useful in protecting and providing, it is true, but generic women are not supposed to be the sole beneficiaries of that strength.
LikeLike
So, we have a disagreement about the role of men in marriage. You mention protection and provision. And I am adding to that moral and spiritual leadership. I think that many men get married and their leadership role is neutralized because their wives rule the home. So masculinity would be not letting your wife neutralize that leadership role. Again, if you don’t think that men are supposed to lead in the way that I do, then this isn’t a problem for you.
When I look at the lives of Christian husbands who reduce their duties to ONLY protector and provider, they have most often achieved nothing with their lives. They are just making their wives comfortable and trying to keep the sex coming and / or avoid a divorce by letting her rule over them. Their children also aren’t producing anything for God. So, I don’t consider merely protecting and providing to be “masculine”, that’s not good enough for me. Men also have to lead, and that’s just according to the standard military or business definition of setting goals, making plans, and motivating people to want to participate in the plans of their own free will. For Christian men, leadership means setting goals TO SERVE GOD, making plans TO SERVE GOD, and motivating people to participate in plans TO SERVE GOD.
If you want to see what I mean by leading a woman, take a look at the 68 episodes of my podcast with Rose. That’s what I mean by masculinity that enables leadership. And then the leadership produces results for God. There is a plan to serve God, and the woman feels motivated to participate in that plan. In my case, the intended goals have to do with equipping Christians to master apologetics and Christian worldview, have an influence in the church, have an influence at the university, raise up influential and effective Christian children, and influence policy so that Christians are able to be free and prosperous enough to be authentic, and to carry out their plans to serve God.
Second, regarding Dina, you just misunderstand what she’s saying. She’s not primarily talking about married couples, but masculinity in general. In general, masculinity is when a man puts his higher purposes first, and any women he deals with have to help him with his higher calling. He is not dragged down to serving her according to her nature. No woman is able to get him off of his service to God and his convictions through her revealing dress or sex appeal. A masculine man lifts her up to his level and makes sure that she is motivated, equipped and supported to serve God. Masculinity is the ability to put the woman to work for God, instead of being domesticated to serve the woman according to her own needs and desires, which typically center around herself. And this applies outside of marriage just as much as it applies within marriage.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Made the same stupid mistakes all the while thinking I was so smart. Only by the Grace of God, I married a good man, but too late for children. The regret of squandering my childbearing years on lies is awful. I pray young women learn from our mistakes and take a better path.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Honestly, you can make a huge difference even without children. My podcast co-host is a widow and she has no children of her own. You can listen to our podcast and see the things that she is able to talk about. We have hundreds of listeners per episode. So you can make a difference with your knowledge.
You can also make a difference by warning young women about feminism. Look at the ministry of Dr. Jennifer Roback Morse, who made just about every mistake you can imagine, and now is a one-woman wrecking crew to feminism (and socialism).
Finally, think about how your love for your husband and letting him lead is a model to the people around you. Love him well, and build him up! That is good work. He is blessed to have you.
LikeLike
If Ms Mulvey was 54 in 2018, then she is 61 in 2025, and not 63.
I have immediate doubts about someones intellect, when they show themselves to be innumerate.
How does the world function when people can’t do simple arithmetic?
Don’t people who write to be read by others even check their work?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Kate Mulvey wrote the article that I linked to in 2018, when she was 56.
But she says this in the 2018 article:
So, if she was 56 when she wrote the article, what age was she when she joined the expensive matchmaking agency? Answer: 56 – 2 = 54. And that’s what my old post was about: 54 year old woman spends her life savings on dating agency.
LikeLike
In Deutschland sagen wir zu Postings wie Ihrer:
“Krümelkotze”
Translation to English:
In Germany, we say about postings like yours: “Crumb vomit”
LikeLiked by 1 person
I saw a couple of her articles. She came across as one of those people with a grossly overblown idea of her own value while speaking very ill of the men who did show interest in her. Now, she has no one at all. She thought she was so above them too.
There’s nothing wrong with preferences, but there is a lot wrong with denigrating others, especially when they and you are the same.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I saw a couple of her articles. She came across as one of those people with a grossly overblown idea of her own value while speaking very ill of the men who did show interest in her. Now, she has no one at all. She thought she was so above them too.
There’s nothing wrong with preferences, but there is a lot wrong with denigrating others, especially when they and you are the same.
LikeLiked by 1 person
She studied French and Italian. We use computers to translate now. What kind of person has 6000 British pounds saved at age 54? It makes no sense to think you are intelligent when you have a long period of old age ahead of you and no money.
LikeLike
I read the entire article, and it’s clear that while she may be regretful, she hasn’t really learned all that much. She still is a third wave feminist at heart. She still has a chip on her shoulder against all things male. She gave herself away when she said she will never play second fiddle to a man, among a few other things. I can’t say I have a whole lot of sympathy for someone like that. A guy would have to have a masochistic streak to want to be with someone who thinks that way.
Sometimes all a person can be is a warning to others.
LikeLike
If still alive, Roald Dahl would have made a humorous novel out of this tragic curriculum vitae
LikeLiked by 1 person
I just can’t understand why she thinks that speaking two languages makes her more intelligent. I can speak two languages, but the more useful languages are the programming languages, which I can actually use to build things that earn money by solving problems for customers.
LikeLike