From the Daily Currant.
Excerpt:
An unemployed gender studies major from Eugene, Ore. sued “The Patriarchy” today in federal court for refusing to give her a job.
In a 25-page brief, attorneys for Sarah Miller-Jones, 24, argue that gender discrimination from the patriarchy has prevented their client from finding gainful employment since she graduated from university three years ago.
The suit seeks $2 million in compensation and $139 million in punitive damages, which together equal $1 from every adult man in America.
“Despite the fact that Ms. Miller-Jones graduated with a 2.8 GPA from the prestigious University of Oregon, she has been unable to find a job fitting her qualifications,” the document reads.
“Ms. Miller-Jones has been on unemployment benefits for 18 months. And despite extensive coursework in Zambian feminist hip-hop she has only received six job offers — all of which were for entry-level call center and health care positions.
“It is outrageous that the patriarchy refuses to offer our client a decent career. She has applied for over 20 positions in the recording, publishing and television industries and has been rejected every single time.
“We all know that terms like ‘no experience’ and ‘lack of relevant education’ are codewords the patriarchy uses to keep keep women in their place. But Ms. Miller-Jones refuses to be a housewife or a nurse. She deserves a real job.”
Millions of young Americans who recently graduated from university are finding themselves working in jobs below their educational level.
Media reports have tended to blame the slow recovery from the Great Recession for the trend. However, an equally important factor is the fact that the American university system turns out too few graduates with employable skills.
There are an estimated 3 million open jobs in the United States that go unfilled due to a lack of qualified candidates. Many of these jobs are in science and engineering, while the most popular majors for U.S. college graduates are in psychology and the liberal arts.
According to a former employer, Miller-Jones’ gender studies degree actually hurt her employability. Gilbert Grass manages a call center for a local credit union in Eugene and says he regrets hiring her straight out of college.
“She refused to use the words ‘he’ or ‘she’ when talking to customers,” he says. “That lead to a lot of confusion. And she once gave a customer who called to check her bank balance a 20-minute lecture on how the film Toy Story perpetuated gender-specific archetypes of heroism.
I’m sorry, but this just makes me laugh so hard. I just want to remind everyone that this is satire. Not real! Not real!
WINTERY KNIGHT 
Reblogged this on Patriactionary and commented:
One could just imagine it, though…
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It’s hilarious. Love it.
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LOL, that really is very funny. Satire running very close to the truth.
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See, this is not really satire. Its rather close to reality. The woman can go on government subsidy, UI assistance, food stamps, ADC.
50% of the population gets resources from the work and travail of others. HER choices, but others are manipulated to subsidize it.
Its obscene.
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I’ve had too many women come in with worthless degrees looking for a job. All of them feel entitled to a management position – ideally one that strictly involves telling others what to do – and a high starting salary.
It’s funny and sad to watch their indignation when I offer a grunt job just above minimum wage. And a lot of the men aren’t any better…
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It’s true – a high education can really heighten your expectations. There is something surreal about getting a high degree and then dropping down to the level you were before you even started working on the degree. It gives you a feeling like you’ve been wasting your time for the last 4 years.
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Based on the people I interview, I’d say that better than half of college graduates have wasted their time – and amassed a huge debt they can’t pay. But their self-esteem has never been higher!
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Wish I could find this article I read recently, very similar to this, bemoaning how unfair the market has become to college grads who made all the decisions they were “told” were the right ones. it focused on two people, one who had something like a librarian’s degree, and the other similarly ill-chosen.
I don’t mean to denigrate either degrees, but simply the naivete of expecting the market to provide you with a job for what interests you most. It’s not the market’s responsibility to give you a job; it’s your responsibility to pursue skills that are needed, to whatever extent will provide you with the means you’re willing to live within.
I say this as an ill-chooser of a degree myself (film/motion pictures — the dramatic arts). Others might use this bit of realism to dissuade people from their passions or “dreams”, but that certainly is not my intent, nor do I think it’s necessary or even proper.
Fine, yes, do what you love, as much as you can, but you’re only giving yourself more trouble and problems if you don’t accept the way industry and productivity works. In short — make yourself useful. We feel no sympathy for companies that go under who haven’t kept providing what the public wants. That’s how trade works. You can’t expect to be given money for something an employer (who is actually working for you and the rest of the public) doesn’t need.
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This could happen even if you chose your degree purely for money. Really, why have a degree, when you can learn a trade. Even STEM students won’t get away with this – the market probably doesn’t need that many scientists anyway, but electricians and accountants are always in demand. Try that.
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NPR just ran a story about women getting jobs in construction. It’s always best to pursue jobs where there’s a demand.
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