Mary sent me this article by John Hawkins, posted at Townhall. (Don’t worry, I linked to the printable version!)
Here’s a few:
2) Obviously Republicans hate women like Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann! Wait, bad examples…uhm, let’s see, they kill female babies, put women’s faces on pinatas and beat them, and degrade women by drawing them with penises in their mouth! That’s still us? Geeze, uh…war on women! Move on to the next item! Hurry, hurry!
5) Did you know Mitt Romney is a Republican? You’re going to vote for a Republican? Seriously? Everybody in my lesbian studies class at Berkeley always says “no” when I ask that question.
9) Mitt Romney is mean! Republicans are mean! You’re mean — unless you vote for Barack Obama, which makes you nice!
12) Did you see how good that guy was at reading speeches off a teleprompter back in 2008? That was really something, wasn’t it? Now it’s all kind of dull, but he might get better at it again.
15) Obama has driven up gas prices, which encourages people to buy more electric cars….ehr, wait, this is for an environmentalist group, right?
I am still very bitter that my Michele Bachmann is not the nominee! I must be one of those people making war on women, then. I think that everyone who thinks that two gay men can effectively parent a six-month old baby should definitely vote for Barack Obama. And so should anyone who thinks that it’s OK to abort an unborn child because she is a girl and not a boy. If those are your views, then Obama is your candidate.
WINTERY KNIGHT 
It seems Christian conservatives are in a bit of a quandary. Thanks to not having the foresight to support more obviously conservative candidates earlier on, now they must vote between an abortion supporting, gay marriage endorsing, China fawning, Catholic church hating Obama, or a flip-flopping, polytheist, Mormon cultist legitimizing Romney. How did it come to this?
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Don’t look at me, I supported Bachmann then Cain then Santorum. But i will say this – Obama in second term would be a BILLION times worse than Romney. We can still win big by electing conservatives to Congress even with a moderate Romney.
I did everything I could, but it’s too late now. Although, since I don’t like Romney, I cannot really blog favorably about him. Instead, I prefer to blog negatively about Obama and then let people make the inference. Naturally, if Romney appointed key conservatives to his campaign in key positions, like John Bolton on foreign policy, Robert George on social policy and Paul Ryan on fiscal policy, then I would blog about Romney, rather than just against Obama.
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And if you believe in partial birth abortion, where they stick a knife into a living babies brain then Obama is your man.
Or if you believe that a baby that happens to survive an abortion should be left to die then Obama is your candidate.
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It’s amazing that people who claim to be Christians can vote for this guy. Whole churches that claim to believe in the Bible voting for someone who supports infanticide.
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Ok, I know this is kind of way of on a tangent but I’ll ask anyway. What is the 180 second rule? Been dying to ask…
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This study claims that most women decide whether she likes a man or not in the first three minutes of meeting him:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1340868/Basic-instinct-Women-just-minutes-make-mind-Mr-Right.html?printingPage=true
It’s based solely on appearance and not at all on whether the man can demonstrate capability to commit, protect, provide, or lead on moral or spiritual issues.
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